If you're wondering what happened to your notcinnamon, I can tell you simply, it got sucked into the vortex of time and money that is my master bathroom.
I will be posting at stage of life regarding the saga of the bathroom renovation, but for now, suffice to say that the score is now: Thirty Year Old, Unpredictable House: 5, Me: 0.
Remember when Diedre Hall was possessed by the Devil on "Days of Our Lives?" about 15 years ago? The demon has moved on to S. What was previously an occasionally sweet and lovable boy has become a bizarre distortion of himself.
This morning, I offered to color in the coloring books (with his new pack of 120 crayons...I love new crayons) and he body slammed me. He got up on the ottoman (I thought he was going to grab Clooney) and he turned and jumped on to me. Unsuspecting, coloring Pluto a lovely goldenrod color, completely defenseless, Me.
I thought I was going to have to get a new ribcage.
Did I get an apology? "Gee, sorry to have nearly killed you, Ma. Are you ok?" No. Nothing. Just a very quick attempt to try to do it again. Which I foiled. Where did THAT impulse come from? Why was he trying to smush me flatter than a pancake? What did I do to him?
S is certainly in a monkey phase now. I find him climbing on banisters and barristers (if they let him), he even does this weird spider crawl thing halfway up a wall. Yes, for real. My son is LITERALLY climbing the walls. (How often can one use that sentence correctly?)
I cannot get him to play outside, play by himself, play with his brother (without committing a misdemeanor), play with his dog (without committing abuse), or entertain himself without an adult fully clothed in that dog training protective gear that you sometimes see Police K9 units wearing.
I don't even know what day for sure his preschool is supposed to start: it is usually one week after public schools start. Which means that theoretically, both my kids could start school the same day, and that day is only 19 days away. And, per Guinness Book of World Records, a group of Chinese karaoke lovers sang 6, 281 songs over 19 days to set the world record in non-stop karaoke singing.
If some poor souls can listen to and sing karaoke for 19 days, then I can survive until the first day of school. Right? Maybe.
So I assume you have been sucked into the vortex too. I haven't heard a peep or an email in days. Hope it is done soon. Why did you decide to do the bathroom now????
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