12 Things I've learned after 12 years of marriage

1. Never underestimate the ability of one partner or another to say something insanely stupid. 2. Always assume that if a partner has lied to get out of an obligation, the other partner will blow it within the week, as in "Oh. RIGHT. Friday. We WERE stuck at some work obligation, not sitting home talking about how glad we were not to be out with you guys." 3. If your husband leaves socks by the bed when you are single, he will still leave socks by the bed 12 years later. Cats are easier to train. 4. Asking your husband how his day was and then interrupting him to talk about your day doesn't score any more points with him than not asking about his day at all. 5. At some point in your marriage, you will watch your husband eat a salad and think to yourself, I would rather die than grow old with this person. 6. Children, to be best loved, should be an indistinguishable blend of both parents. One that resembles a partner too much may suffer unfairly for it on occasion. 7. Someone always has to be the bad guy. 8. A sense of humor will not get you through everything. The last laugh is not usually worth it. 9. Couples have been fighting about housework since the first man dropped his spear in a cave. They will be fighting long into the future. Accept your place in this history, know you will fight about it, and be prepared to do it anyway. 10. Couples have been fighting about money since the first woman spent her shells on a new teepee. They will be fighting about it long into the future. Accept that you spent too much on something you didn't REALLY need, and try to do better next time. 11.When people tell their kids that the divorce isn't the kids' fault, they are lying. EVERYTHING is the kids' fault. 12. Don't let your husband know your blog's web address.