Holy Mother of God. I'm still shoveling and am barely peeking over the rim of the hole I'm in! First off, full apologies for my absence. Primarily, I became obsessed with painting the wrought iron on my front porch. And by obsessed, I mean that I considered stealing one of those giant diesel generators construction crews use on the highways to light their work at night. I could paint at night. SURE. I was actually dreaming about painting. And I was doing ok. Except, I started out with what I thought was a lovely gunmetal gray/blue and wound up with purple. So halfway through, I changed my mind and repainted with sage green. Which, by the way, I am very happy with. But during my obsession, there was no time to do anything. My children were dirty and neglected, my husband unfed and untended to, and my house in chaos. But, I was out there painting, dammit.
Then, we all trouped off to Toronto to visit M's family, and to meet his best friend's fiancee. The trip, while fulfilling all stereotypes of the frigid north, was actually very successful. Of course, M and I resorted to the lowest form of parenting: bribery, but we exploited it to the full extent. For each day the kids were good, they each got a surprise--Hot Wheels, coloring books, Star Wars figurines. M and I only had to use the parental look of death combined with the dread scream-whisper of "there will be no treat if I have to speak to you again" and all was right. A useful stop gap measure in the face of staying in some one else's house and also having great aunts who they didn't remember ever meeting love on them and pinch their cheeks. My kids are freakish around new people, and the lure of a Hot Wheel warmed them right up.
Too bad there was nothing to warm us up! Our last night there, it must have been ten below. Very very cold. And there comes a point, apparently, where even alcohol won't keep the toes toasty.
So, despite a notable failure of the hockey game, everything else was great--Royal Ontario Museum, Science Center, brunch, even dinner at a French Bistro--all finessed by the finest made in China crap money can buy. The hockey game was humorous insofar as we arrived during the team's warm ups and sat through the Zamboni treatment of the rink, which S thought was the greatest thing ever (a car! On ice! Cleaning! Driving! Together!). Of course, then the game began, and I had to spend the entire first quarter counting down minutes for S until the intermission when the Zamboni machine would be back. My kids are nothing if not predictable.
Since we got back, I have been engulfed in another obsession of cleanliness. After nearly a week in my father in law's immaculate town house, I have been inspired to deep clean (again). His housekeeper is an inspiration--the silver trays and things are polished and then wrapped in Saran Wrap to prevent tarnishing! So, yah, it's true that my father in law lives alone, has a five day/week housekeeper, and is out of town half the year. Which may be an unfair standard to measure cleanliness to, given dog, children, and constant habitation, but nonetheless, my ambition is high.
Last night and this morning, I cleaned out the kitchen cupboards. I was doing the sensible one cabinet at a time thing, until I realized that some of the arrangements were dreadfully impractical. That's when things got nasty--all the cabinet contents were on the floor, and I was vacuuming, bleaching (I found cockroach pooh), and organizing well into the evening. (No generator required inside!) This AM, I finished the cupboards, then washed all of them with Murphy's Oil Soap, disassembled the microwave to wash its greasy parts, washed all of the appliances, ran all the barware through the dishwasher, cleaned all the counters, washed all the baseboards, scrubbed the floor, and put everything in its place.
There is some question about my sanity.
SOOOOOOOOOOOO, as long as I can keep my obsessions to a reasonable length (that is, doable in one day) I will keep posting daily. God help us all if I get started on something bigger!
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