Crap I hate:
1. Halloween. It is for children. Costumes make me feel stupid, and if intelligent life were watching us from their spaceships, they'd think we'd lost it.
2. Adults doing crap that is supposed to be for kids, in general. Dressing up, twee bows, professional cheerleaders for pro sports teams, playing video games, collecting dolls. (I'm looking at you, Marie Osmond)
3. Overly creepy costumes for kids. There is no need for an Xtra small brain-eating, bleeding face, machine gun toting zombie ghost guerrilla. Stop it. You're giving them nightmares.
4. Trunk or treats. Wha? If you're gonna do it, do it right. Piss off the curmudgeonly neighbors (like me) and eat the candy that does not, I promise, have razor blades in it. Or drugs.
5. "Sexy Costumes." Nobody looks good enough to wear them, they are not actually costumes, and they make you look like a whore. So, just go as a whore.
No comments:
Post a Comment