Midnight Mayhem

There is a recently not-renewed, failing in the ratings, extended miniseries on TV right now. It is poorly acted, poorly scripted, and completely terrible. The plot represents something like Melrose Place meets Survivor. Only rather than getting voted off the island, our characters are individually picked off by a sadistic and really stealthy mass murderer. So, I confess, I have been watching every episode of Harper's Island.
Last night we made the mistake of watching it last thing before bedtime. Then, I had to go outside in the dark all alone, to let the dog pee. When I come inside, M is waiting around the corner and scares the living daylights out of me. In the total dark of the house, he's whispering "die, die, die" as we go up the stairs. In the dark bedroom, I turn on my nightstand light, and he's like 4 inches from my face, making the I'm about to stab you gesture and wearing a psychopath expression. Absolute cardiac arrest.
By now, I have enough adrenaline in my blood to run to Pensacola, and it's unlikely that I will be dozing off anytime soon.
M raises his eyebrows at me in the universal husband signal for "hey, baby..." and I respond with, "doing it would be more terrifying than the movie." And that is his punishment for scaring me.
I tell him that we should hope neither kid wanders into our room in the middle of the night, as I will be in heightened self-defense mode, and will probably knock him out. (Actually, E DID wander in to our room, and I managed to differentiate his profile from that of serial killer, and slept with him in his room for a while. He was having nightmares--and really who am I not to empathize with that? Also, his room has REALLY spooky noises at night.)
Finally, the adrenaline starts to ebb, and I can hear M's breathing start to become more shallow and even and quiet. I am feeling bitter that he can just go to sleep unaffected by the terrifying slaughter of a bunch of twenty-somethings alone on an island in the Pacific Northwest. (As a side note, what family knows only beautiful people, consists of only beautiful people, and manages to stay beautiful despite being hunted through the beautiful forests and beautiful rustic towns of Washington State?) My bitterness grows. I am lying there, thinking of the gruesome dis-arming of one of tonight's characters. I am also irritated that I have been sucked into this idiotic show. It's B-A-D. I start silently speculating how many weeks of the show are left, and whom, among the final 7 are going to make it back to civilization. Then, I realize I am STILL awake, and still affected by this stupid show.
So, I sneak up right above M, grasp him suddenly, and give him a scary "argh!" He sits upright in bed, totally disoriented and scared. I feel better about everything, roll over to sleep, and leave him lying next to me, adrenaline pumping.