Day 1: Boarding the ship in a total downpour. The lady at the excursion desk said she hadn't seen lightning like that in 2 years at sea. Always how one wants to start one's vacay. Oh, that and eleven hundred Saints fans pissed that the game won't be televised on board.
Day 2: FunDay at Sea. Everything on Carnival Cruise Lines is supposed to be Fun! FunCasino! FunActivities! FunShips! Fun FUN FUN, mother &*(#$. We will cram fun down your FunThroat. This is the day I spend wandering the boat, totally disoriented. I turn a corner, thinking, "this should be a dining room" and Voila! It is a bar. Fortunately, there are many bars on board and one can always stop for directions. And a drink. My bar tab, incidentally was a sizable proportion of the entire trip's total. I got lost a lot.
Day 3: Key West, Florida. S wisely made the call to stay on board at FunCamp while we went on a FunExcursion. We took a guided tour of the Hemingway Home, led by a guide named Dave who looked alarmingly like Tommy Lee Jones...with permanently tattooed eyeliner. So, more like Tommy Lee Jones and Liberace. He pronounced Hemingway like Himmminway and had this kitsch mannerism that really must be heard to be appreciated. We also visited the "Little White House," which was President Truman's retreat while he was in office. Havanese shirts, male bravado, and all. It was very informative.
I get that Key West is a tourism mecca. That nobody (Except Tour Guide Dave) actually lives there, but Duval Street is really a crime against humanity. Bar after bar, interspersed with totally foul t shirt stores (I got Duval Faced on Shit Street), and unusually named bed and breakfasts "The Love Muscle." E liked the six toed cats at Himminway's house.
Day 3: Free day in Freeport, Bahamas. A lovely day spent on a lovely beach. I always wonder what all those people are shopping for...
Day 4: Snorkeling in Nassau. Ultimate day for me: wake up, get on sail boat. Sail to reef. Snorkel on reef. Get back on boat. Sail home while drinking rum punch. Ahhhh.
Day 5 & 6: FunDays at Sea! The weather on the last day was horrible: driving rain, huge seas, strong winds. But all of that goes away with a nap. And a strong drink. I get the whole Piratey grog thing now.
Anyhoodles, thought I'd rope you in for some generalities. Stories to follow...So good to be home...Stay tuned for more.
