So, S is continuing his all-continent total mortification tour. He has misbehaved in ever N.American country, in several cities, time zones, and International Waters. (Into which I was tempted to throw him.)
Today, his behaviour (still inMontreal, you know) was so awful, that I contemplated going into "Sexxy Sexxy" to buy a whip to spank him. Last night, we took him to a pie restaurant. YES, PIE. And he couldn't manage to behave, eat properly, or not cry. And there was PIE. And brownies, and cake, and chocolate milk, and crayons, and, and and...
Despite S's best efforts, we are having a pretty good visit. My French is disastrously bad. It is so hard to keep up. The weather is so bad, even the locals are complaining, except of course our Most Optimistic Friend, TC. MOFTC still professes to enjoy the "seasons" and whatnot. I am very happy with Mobile's seasons: hot and hotter. It is in the 40s with rain. Except the other morning, the weather gods heard me complaining and stopped the rain...and made it snow. All of the family and friends we have visited, though, are in good health and happiness. Which is so nice. When you see some people once every ten years, they often have a laundry list of ailments and minor catastrophes, and none of our visits have been like that.
Of course, the airlines canceled the route we had originally scheduled home. They did one of those standard emails: "your itinerary has been f**d." We don't get home until midnight tomorrow night.
We had a lot of fun at the wedding on Sunday. It was a great mishmash of people from around the world. Also, the longest version of the Hora I have ever heard. We also got to see my in laws, who look great. I hope they enjoyed their 20 hour trip away from their kids!
For those of you in AL who just endured my psychotic cleaning frenzy ahead of my family's most recent visit: good news! My mom is coming back next month! Dustbunnies, beware.
Looking forward to coming home tomorrow. M has canceled any vacations that might have been floating around my brain lately. I don't think we will be dragging him out of his ZIP code anytime soon.
We are staying in a house built in 1870 to house priests from the Cathedral across the street. Unfortunately, in 140 years, the floors have become uneven, and poor M lost half of a big toenail in a bloody stubbing incident on Friday. The poor guy has been a real trouper (funny Canadians and their random u's), but sadistic Sam keeps stepping on it. I think that either S is testing him, or that S is the most accurate pain-maker of the day. I think it is an apt metaphor for S's recent emotional treatment of his family.
It's 3:30 am here in WA (preggers insomnia is a real beeyotch), and here I sit -- still giggling and trying not to pee in my pants -- having just poured through your archives. You are one supremely funny lady.
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